June 07, 2012

Word quota

Perhaps it's the still and stale weather, or the mundaneness of the work I do in office the past week, or an aching lower back, or the restraint that has to be exerted on the pocket this month or just an unknown misalignment of the stars... I have been feeling splendidly lethargic for the whole of this week (today being Day 4 of this week).

On day 1, I thought I was rather alright, just not too excitable - which is really a normal trait that one observes of me. I knew that I was downright tired on day 2, after an existential wait to collect my tablet from Samsung at the Customer Service Centre followed by an hour of body toning workout (and I just had 2hour rock-climbing session 2 days before that), and greeted by never-finishing laundry task. Maybe the physical fatigue spilled over to day 3 and sort of influenced a mental and emotional fatigue too. I was, simply, not keen to engage in anything that requires more effort than necessary to stay alive, clean and un-hungry.

Day 4 is today and I'm feeling the pit of boredom. Maybe that's even too optimistic - the bottom could be lower than I imagine.

At a spur of uninspired living, I went to check out price of air tickets to Myanmar - the most recent country that has seen a new wave of democratic and political inspiration. A mistake, as it now costs more than when I checked in February, to fly SIN-RGN-SIN. Hence, adding to my hopelessness that I would have to endure this uninspired and lethargic phase of my life for a little while more, in uninspiring environment, under lethargic weather.

I have gone so bored and wit-less that I can't even come up with alternative words to describe my... well, lethargy.

The good thing - as all dark clouds have some silver lining (though sometimes, it's kind of hard to distinguish silver from light grey) - is that I have an interesting book in the stash now. The difference is so stark that I actually feel my brain firing away when I read the book, vis-a-vis when I'm not.

I thought of the word quota theory that Bblics and I conveniently use to explain our bouts of silence and incapability to show enthusiasm in life and other human beings. It goes that, we each have a fixed number of words that we utter in a given period of time (word quota) and when we exceeded the quota, we just can't work ourselves up enough to talk unless absolutely necessary (though as you can well see, I still can write). Question is, when will we receive the next batch of quota? Answer is, absolutely no idea.

Someone or something needs to give it a spark, I guess. Till then, the solitude is between the written word and me.

Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 16:00